Considering the things you are not is acting from a fear-based position. Using a sports analogy, it’s taking a defensive posture designed to keep a team from losing. It can be a useful strategy at times, but more often than not it’s an unsatisfying way to play. Instead of trying not to lose, it’s more fun to try to win. Life is like that, too.
For inspiration, I invite you to learn about “satisficers” and “maximizers.” Satisficers are people who find a solution that will meet a certain set of criteria and accept it. They are satisfied at that point. Maximizers think there might still be a better solution and keep looking. They want to maximize their awareness of solutions before choosing one. Research shows that satisficers tend to be happier people.
At different times we are all satisficers and maximizers, but we tend to lean in the direction of one over the other. Learn more here and in the video below.